He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
