I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
