cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
