He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
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