She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
