is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Randomize
