I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
