I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
