Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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