I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
