Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
Randomize
