I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
