i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
