D3 body, D1 cock
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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