put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
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