she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
