I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
