I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
