and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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