real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
