I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize