I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Randomize
