just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
