butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
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