is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize