She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
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