Can i not drive my cunt home
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize
