I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
my nose is crying tears of wow.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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