is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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