Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Randomize
