i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
