I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
