i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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