i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
