Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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