I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
