Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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