And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
