dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
