found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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