this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Randomize
