I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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