Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
