At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
