can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize