shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
