I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
