You're so nebulous sometimes
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
So apparently I’m into choking now
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
