i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Is Oprah even human
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
