I just made out with a guy for $7.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Randomize