Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I just googled if crying burns calories
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
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